Trust Again

In the last two weeks, we added a new 'little one' to our ever growing family. Baby Hope. As I held her in my arms yesterday, she struggled to keep her eyes open. At times, she managed to have at least one open - to better see who was holding her close; who was providing that safe place that so many of us long for.

I couldn't help but reflect on how a baby trusts with their whole heart. They don't know any different at the age of 14 days old. Interestingly enough, as I held her and thought about she trusted me 100%, I felt that those moments also encapsulated trust for me, as well. It was as if time stood still and it was just me and Baby Hope. I sang into her ear, and in return, she quieted her baby cries and both eyes closed. Wow! It's a life-altering moment, but sadly, as we grow older, we all will experience a moment where trust is broken and no longer exists - usually with a person who plays a significant role in our life. If we are fortunate, that breaking of trust only happens once, but what if it happens again ... and again ... and again. Our trust level gets less and less, and the shell around our heart grows thicker and thicker.

I've been there from my early childhood experiences. Maybe you have as well. So how do we break down that thick wall that keeps growing each time someone breaks our trust? For me, I've summed it up to one word: C

OURAGE. Having the courage to let go of the responsibility of others' actions; courage to dare to trust again. I've developed a lot more discernment since my early childhood. And while I want to be the kind of person that trusts readily, it doesn't take long before the sign 'proceed with caution' comes out and is at the forefront of my next adventure.

The breaking of trust in our lives also comes with a hefty package called 'hurt'. Often, we attempt to take a journey to 'forgive and forget' and right when I think I've mastered that road, something pops back up in my life that can potentially send the message 'Danger, Danger - do not trust'. I'm guessing many of you experiencing that same warning light. I've learned a not so little secret - forgiveness is an act of the head, but healing from a broken trust can't be forgiven - it can only be healed. Sit on that thought for awhile. We can only be healed by the One who created us. God doesn't want us to sit in a pile of mistrust and hurt - He wants us to experience wholeness in Him. Surrendering our hurt and allowing Him to heal us leads us to a richer life in Him. Through this process we learn to trust HIM to be our Healer, be our Provider, be someone who we can trust wholeheartedly. When we do this, we esteem Him (Psalm Psalm 53). When I bring my mistrust and hurt to Him, I am telling Jesus that what He did on the cross is enough for me. His dying on the cross is now honored by me taking the time to acknowledge that He is enough. Is He enough for you today? He is one who you can totally put your trust in and He will also teach us how to be trustworthy in return.